“BOTTOM: That will ask some tears in the true performing of it.
If I do it, let the audience look to their eyes.
I will move storms! I will condole in some measure.
To the rest, my chief humor is for a tyrant.
I could play Ercles rarely.”
A Midsummer Night’s Dream I.ii
Elizabethan holiday tradition included exchanging gifts - not on Christmas, as we do, but on January 1, marking the year’s fresh start. Tokens of friendship and loyalty could be as simple as a pomander: a clove-studded orange worn on a chain to waft a sweet fragrance over stale indoor odors. But for Queen Elizabeth I, New Year’s Day was an opportunity to collect extravagant treasures from her courtiers and diplomats, as her gift rolls attest. If she reciprocated, her gift’s value revealed the recipient’s position in the hierarchy of her favor.
On New Years’ Day 1582, at Whitehall, the court itself became a stage. The high-stakes politics behind that year’s royal gift giving played out in front of everyone there through theatrics worthy not only of Shakespeare, but of modern soap operas. Let’s join the assembled courtiers and see what happens!
🌬️ Act I, Scene I: Contrary Winds
As Christmas 1581 approached, the King of France’s younger brother, Hercule (“Er-cles”) Francois, Duke of Anjou and Alencon, nicknamed her “Frog” by the Queen, had been preparing to leave London with hopes to lead an army against the Spanish in the Netherlands. Strong winds, however, kept him and his barges stranded in the Thames. Although his face had been scarred by smallpox and his spine twisted by scoliosis, the Duke was heir presumptive to the throne of France.
Just before New Year’s Day, still delayed, the Duke received some devastating news. Despite years of courtship and many public declarations of affection - including kissing him on the lips in church - Elizabeth had decided she would never marry him, though it would make her “empress of all the world”. She instructed William Cecil, Lord Burghley to beg Alencon to accept her as “a friend and sister, without thinking of her as a wife.”
Had the royal Anglo-French flirtation reached its final curtain?
🎭 Act I, Scene II: The Dramatic Unfolding of the Hanky
When Elizabeth’s decision was made public in court a few days after Christmas, Alencon’s response was nothing short of dramatic. He rose to the occasion with Gallic fervor and ego, proclaiming that he would rather lose his life now than leave England without marrying her.
As sharp-tongued as ever, she asked if he meant to threaten a poor old woman in her own country. She was 48 and he was 25, so “old” wasn’t far from the truth, but “poor” was a tactical retort and a major clue to their conversation’s subtext. She cautioned him not to lose the best friends he had with such words.
The Duke’s operatic reply: “No, no, Madam! I would rather tear myself to bits with my own hands than lose the hope of marrying you and become the derision of the whole world!” He then burst into manly tears.
Elizabeth’s response to this display of emotion by her rejected suitor? She handed him her handkerchief.
Can you image Alencon making his exit, stage left, one hand held to his forehead, the other clutching the Queen’s hanky over his heart?
💎 Act I, Scene III: A Queen’s Ransom
Despite his outburst, the Duke didn’t let rejection stop him from presenting spectacular and expensive New Year’s gifts. On New Year’s Day, he offered Elizabeth this array of dazzling treasures:
A gold-edged ship, glittering with diamonds and rubies
A bouquet of four small jeweled roses and one large white rose with a sapphire and rubies, a diamond daisy and a fluttering ruby-studded butterfly
A golden flower encrusted with rubies and diamonds, featuring a hind and two pearl pendants
A gold chain engraved with the words “Serviet eternum dulcis quem torquet Eliza” (May he whom sweet Eliza torments serve her forever.)
A lock of gold.
Talk about gifts certain to catch a woman’s attention!
🥀 Act I, Scene IV: Any Awkward Moments There?
True to his word, Alencon refused to depart the English court. He entered the New Year’s joust that lasted until 1:00 am on a chariot, and danced with Elizabeth at the Twelfth Night festivities, as if nothing had changed.
What did they talk about while they were dancing?
This saga is far from over and we will find out more in Act II when the politics masquerading as a love story are revealed. You won’t want to miss it!
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